Getting Started 3/2/14

Getting started is never the problem,
It's finding the time to finish.

Today's Theme: Getting Started

Mental birth canal

The page will linger lonely

If I don't just push

April Song

Being a goddess isn't easy. Some days, she found herself so caught up in taking care of her mother, The Queen, and following the orders of her domineering sister, she forgot to eat; to nurture herself. Some nights, after tending to their soul sucking demands, she found herself sitting alone dreaming of a future filled with love and a Prince to recognize her kind heart reflected in her beauty. Alas, time was beating down her spirit. The more she met their demands, the more they demanded. Feeling lost, she knew it was time to make a change or die. 

She knew consulting The Oracle, was opening Pandora's Box. Still, she felt in the depths of her heart, that her destiny must be found, and she realized it could never be found tending to the needs of her never satisfied family. As she climbed the high cliffs over looking the turbulent sea, her long hair swept behind her beating her face, and her flowing gowns tore against her hips. Today was the day it would all be transformed. She threw a coin over the cliff as the fire in the ancient urn exploded before her. 

Breathless, she cried:

"Oracle! I am ready to change my destiny! To follow my stars! Please show me the way!"

The Ancient Voices of Love decreed:

"Put a Message in a bottle

For your sweet soul to find

Blow out out the unkind winds

And speak your beautiful mind

Cast forth your hearts true wish

And KNOW it will all unfold

You know there's never any satisfaction

In just doing what you are told

In other's limited lives

You they seek to confine

Afraid of their own freedom

Afraid of what they cannot define 

So do this act in faith 

With your heart all in: commit

Declare to your past ghosts

That you refuse to submit 

From this day forth, you shall

Truly remember who you are

Half of heavens twin flame love

A magical shooting star

The other half of your heart is in you

In all you shall see

And all you shall do

And he shall appear before you

Once you find the true you

So take heart my dear and trust

That this will all come to be

Remember who you are: a goddess

And set your pure heart free!"

With a roar, the fire went out and the sea subsided. She made her way back to the gates of the castle where she had a horse waiting. She knew it would take some time to find him, and she vowed to keep him in her heart's song all along the way. She felt it in her bones: This adventure would be a long one. Freedom always comes at a great price. Yet, the highest reward is found only in following ones heart. Today, she was certain she had taken the first step that would eventually lead her into the arms of her heart's hero: the other half of her brave soul.

Chasing the Shadow 2/24/14

I chased after that shadow,

For way too many years,

With nothing left to show for it,

Except years of heartache and of tears.

So many times I tried to let go,

Even succeeded a time or two,

Until the dreams would bring it back,

And haunt my days anew.

But I knew I had to do away,

With all the false hopes and dreams,

Because in the place where shadows dwell,

Nothing is ever as it seems.

So I put it away, though it took too long,

I should have done it years ago,

Now the shadow is finally laid to rest,

I finally let it go.

TLA 2/24/14

5 Weeks Ago Today

Celebrating every minute of every day. 5 weeks ago, I was lucky! Appendix ruptured, and peritonitis was setting in but I escaped death just in time. Gratitude hits me in waves;)

***********

No you just don't get me

Now your dark energy sets me free, even though you didn't mean it to be.

This time I let it ride, oh all the lines and lies

And lived in spite

Lies always killin me

But this time I know I'll live to see

The northern lights shining bright, on the end of the Earth.

More sunny days and party nights. 

All I am and can be again

You didn't kill you didn't win

I pushed the dark into the light

I sold your lies to buy my life

I'm well and good as I'll ever be

The toxic mass, absorbed your hate. I turned from anger to change my fate.

Dancing free, I finally found me. 

More Appendectomy Thoughts

One morning after a laparoscopic appendectomy, I awakened with the profound realization that my own existence does indeed have validity.  Upon that realization, I vowed to never again question my place in this world. Whether or not people like me-doesn't matter. Whether or not people outside of my beautiful family understand me-can no longer injure my feelings. Fear of being misunderstood and subsequently judged poorly, is as useful as my harvested appendix. I'm free to be myself-free to explore my own story as a writer; to celebrate that freaky story with love and pride. I own this. What a great gift for the new year. 

7 O'Clock 1/2/14

When 7 o’clock comes,

And you can’t make the call,

When you try to go on,

But feel lost in it all.

Where everything changes,

In the blink of an eye,

Where you can’t find your place,

No matter how hard you try.

How do you keep moving,

When you've lost your stride,

How do you face every day,

Knowing something has died?

Why can’t it be simple?

Why can’t you ever feel whole?

Why is the pain never-ending,

That you feel in the depth of your soul?

TLA